Mid First Week Report

As usual, my plan is not going off without a hitch, but it's okay. :)

Monday and Tuesday went very well, and I've been doing pretty well with my macros all week, but I haven't gotten my workouts in as I was planning. Today is cheat day. YAY.

See, Wednesdays and Thursdays are a little crazy for us. Wednesday, we have dance classes from 5:30-7:00. Thursdays, Matt works a full day at the hospital, comes home and tries to sleep before going to his home care job overnight and straight to another full day at the hospital Friday morning. It's crazy. So, that kinda threw off the workout schedule.

As far as my new Plexus journey, my box arrived yesterday!!! Matt and I are splitting it for now until we can afford to get 2 Triplex combo packs per month. I had my first official Slim pink drink yesterday, and we both took a ProBio5 (their probiotic)with dinner. This morning, we both took 2 BioCleanse capsules, and Matt took 2 Xfactor capsules. Well, we are both feeling the cleanse already... especially Matt... at work... Sorry, honey!

I am so happy school is almost over! The next big thing is our dance recital. We have 5 children performing this year, and I'm in 2 performances myself! It will be quite a day!!

Anyway, I hope you are all taking care of your own O2 masks! Have a great day!

My egg whites didn't turn out too bad ;)

Making the Journey Mine

Okay. Here it goes...

Last year was great. Last year, I started seeing that I could be stronger and more fit than I thought I could be. I started weight training. I started learning about macros. All of my progress came to an abrupt halt due to circumstances beyond my control. Then, I just slowly quit. I quit calculating my macros. I quit working out. I quit blogging. I just got so discouraged.

Well, I'm ready to move on now and make my health and fitness journey my own. It's very good to give credit where credit is due, but as one of my midwives taught me, the greatest coaches teach you that it's all about you, and you don't really need them to succeed. The greatest coaches empower you; they don't use you to promote themselves.

So, I've gained 15lbs over the last 9 months, and I've lost any muscle development I'd gained. All the kids are odd numbered ages now:13, 11, 9, 7, 5, 3, and 1.5; and we recently joined the YMCA as a family. It's nice. Free childcare makes a huge difference!

I have to do this. I will do this. I put too much stock in a person and I gave that person way too much credit for my success. The truth is that I worked my butt off last year. I pushed myself. I dedicated myself to following a meal plan. I am grateful for the tools that were given to me to succeed, but I did the work. It is important for me to remember that.

I found another mom of 7 on Instagram named Jessica Enslow. She is in amazing shape, and since she's a little older than I am, a little shorter than I am, and has had as many babies, I feel like what she does is something I could do too. I am going to start here.

I also signed up with Plexus today. I hope these health products help me have more energy and maybe I'll be able to even get off my antidepressant. Who knows. I just know that my body needs some recuperation after 14.5 years of pregnancies and breastfeeding for almost all that time.

I have to prove this to myself, and I will. I hope you're all doing well. It's really nice to be back.

Here are some pics from this evening. I did legs and abs with Isaiah. Selah got in on it too!

Baby Fist Bump! Let's do this!

Jesus, Don't Let Me Be a Weak Woman with Strong Muscles.

Strength training is pretty great. It's amazing to start lifting heavier weights, and feel yourself getting stronger. What's on my mind tonight isn't about dumbbells or barbells or kettlebells. No, I could increase my physical strength all I want, but if I don't increase my inner strength, what's the use? If I reach or exceed my fitness goals, but I can't control my tongue or my temper, I am not truly a strong woman. If I can lift heavy weights, but treat my family and friends like garbage when I am under pressure, I am nothing but a weak woman with strong muscles.

Lately, my fitness life has been a wreck. In a way it's good because it is forcing me to see things in the light of truth, and my perspective is getting clearer. I am seeing that my fitness "house" has been built on the sand. So, when the storms came, the house went "SPLAT" as the song goes. So, where's the rock I can rebuild on? Where is my sure and solid foundation?

I am a Christian. I choose to put my faith in Jesus Christ. So, I did a quick search for Bible verses about strength. Here are some I found:

Philippians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Isaiah 40:29-31

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not be faint.

Psalm 119:28

My soul is weary with sorrow, strengthen me according to your word.

Ephesians 6:10

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.

Mark 12:30

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Father, thank you for putting some things in my life lately that have shown great weakness in me. Thank you for revealing those weaknesses so you can make them strengths. You are so good to me. Please use me for good. Please use me to love people with the love of Jesus. Thank you that I can trust that you will increase my strength. Help me to be a strong woman inside and out. 

True Gains

Having body builder friends has opened up a whole new world to me. Part of that is learning new phrases. The three I hear the most are: "Killing it!", "Crushing it!", and "Gains".  I didn't know what "gains" meant. I guessed it meant gaining muscle weight,  but I was wrong. "Gains" means any progress that gains ground on the way to reach your goals: losing weight, increasing endurance or strength, strengthening balance, etc.  It's actually a cool word to use.

Today was just one of those days that nothing seemed to go right. By evening, I was so stressed out. I had all this negative energy, and it was snapping out at my kids. Now, usually, I would've drown my stress in many pieces of chocolate sneaked out of sight of my kids. I would've eaten more and more until I started feeling sick. However, tonight was different. Even though I did succumb to a handful of chocolate chips in some almond butter, I did not make myself sick on sweets. Instead, I texted my mother in law and asked her if I could drop off the kids for a couple hours so I could go burn off some steam at the gym. She said she could! HALLELUJAH!!!!!!  So, I dropped them off and headed to the gym where I got on the elliptical and burned more calories than I've ever burned! That was so much better than getting sick on cookies or chocolates. 

One of those days...

I'm thankful for my bad day now because God used it to show me how I've gotten stronger in my spirit as well as in my body. That got me thinking about true gains. What I saw tonight in how I've grown stronger in stress management was a true gain. 

"For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?" -Mark 8:36

A dear friend of mine has been strongly encouraging me in the direction of finding my comfort and strength in Christ alone, and not looking to any person to fill the void only He can fill. No praise or approval or physical "gains" can take the place of all we have in Christ. If I take this verse and read it how it's hitting my heart right now, it would say this:

465 calories!!!

"Sarah, what good is it if you reach all your physical goals, but lose sight of the things that are eternally valuable? What good is it if you teach your children to make healthy choices, but don't lead them to Jesus?"

I'm doing awesome physically. I'm losing weight. I'm getting stronger. My body is changing fast. Okay, all that is good! Be happy about that. Be proud of the work it has taken to get this far, but don't neglect your soul. Honestly, I can't remember the last time I read the Bible to strengthen my faith. We have missed so much church. My prayer life is lukewarm. How do I expect to get strong in my faith if I don't put in the work? That's like never working out and eating whatever I want, and expecting to be fit and strong physically. Think about that. It's absurd! 

So, I'm on track training my body, and I can see that it is having a good effect on my character, but I need training for my spirit, for my soul. I have Jesus, and I want to start living like it. I want to start pushing myself to true gains.

I Will Be Brave. Here It Goes. (Progress Pics)

Matt updated my progress pictures today. He told me that I should be brave and share the ones that show my midsection to show you how far I've really come in the last 7 weeks. This is scary for me, but in the hope that it may encourage or inspire someone out there, I will share these with you. The pictures on the left were taken on April 8th. The pictures on the right were taken today, May 26th. I am very thankful for my trainer and all he is teaching me about diet and exercise. I just do whatever he tells me to do, and clearly he knows what he's doing because I'm seeing results fast!

Food Glorious Foooooood!!

Okay, it's late. I'm tired. I am learning a lot about food lately, and those vultures from Ice Age The Meltdown just popped in my head singing that Food song.  Hahaha!!

I'm doing very well on my diet plan, but there have been some struggles. Here are the lessons I am learning that are true for me:

1. Healthy eating requires a clean kitchen.  When there are few clean dishes or counter space and the stove top is a dirty cluttered mess, the idea of food prep is overwhelming!!  The opposite is also true. When my kitchen is clean, I am inspired to spend time there making good food and treats for my family.

2. It is hard for me to get in all my meals. It has a lot to do with point #1, but also, I need to prep for the week so I can just grab a ready made meal, warm it up, and eat. As it is, I am often having my 2nd meal (2 of 6) at lunchtime. I was feeling lightheaded the other day doing my workout because I just needed to eat.

3. Tilapia is best with taco seasoning!!!

4. Cheat day is important. It helps me stay strong because I know I'll allow myself to indulge in just a few days! When I started this process, I didn't get that.

5. Cheat day is dangerous. My cheat day is on Tuesday because Matt is usually off. Last Tuesday, I made tacos and coca cola cake. It was so good. . . too good. . . ugh. . . I haven't weighed myself since, and it's Saturday night. . .

6. I need my almond butter. I am supposed to eat 2 tablespoons of natural peanut butter/almond butter at night. I ran out a couple days ago, and I feel like I'm cheating because I am substituting with walnuts and some protein shake mix and water or fat free plain Greek yogurt.

7. I CAN make amazing chocolate chip cookies and not eat any (cookies or dough). I just did it today and my respect for my will power went up a lot. It is a big deal to me because I could eat 6 of those cookies easy after a few spoonfuls of cookie dough. BUT I DID IT! I even rinsed off the chocolate that got on my finger. Take that, Chocoholism!!! BOOM!


I guess 7 is my number of lessons to share. I will continue to work on getting my kitchen cleaned up and beautiful. Meanwhile, there is a container of rice and a container of fish to get me through tomorrow!

**This has nothing to do with food, but I want to share this collage that my trainer made with some pictures he took of our fun "Baby Day" at the gym. Isaiah came with me, and now believes he will be huge and ripped in a few years. It was a fun day. Selah sure enjoyed it! It was very cool of him to make a babywearing workout plan for us. It sure makes it more challenging!!

It's Not Just About My Body. It's About My Life.

Like a lot of moms, I often feel like I am totally screwing up my kids. I am basically a hot mess. I always have been. The house is a mess. The laundry is insane. We are late at least half the time. I forget things. I have a hard time remembering to put things away. I think about making dinner when it is time to eat it. Really. I even drive myself nuts. However, I am pretty good at talking to my kids, connecting with them, really hearing them and encouraging them to be open with me by earning their trust. I try hard to validate their feelings, and teach them what is right through love and understanding. I encourage my husband to go after his dreams and ambitions. I try to be a good friend. I've learned the hard way to not judge others, but to love them just as they are. But that other stuff that I stink at. . . it really bothers me and makes me feel like a failure all. the. time.

One of my major motivations for working so hard on my fitness goals is to teach myself self control. I am never going to be better at any of those things if I can't even discipline myself with my own body. Everything I eat now is planned. I workout based on a plan. I am reaching my goals, and I'm pushing myself hard. 

You may have heard of Flylady. Flylady encourages you to get your home under control baby step by baby step. The first step is to shine your sink. The reason she emphasizes this so much is to give you something to feel proud of everyday. Even if the whole house is a mess, you can look at your shiny sink, and feel like you've accomplished something. Suddenly, the rest of your housework seems doable. 

I think I am my own shiny sink. I want to bring my body under control so I can prove to myself that I can be disciplined. I can work hard. I can stick with it. I can reach my goals. I can be strong in my body and in my spirit. When that happens, I believe everything else will get better. 

One kind of silly thing that encourages me is this: I made this side by side picture of Mrs. Incredible and Wonder Woman. I jokingly say that I found my "before and after training pictures". The thing is: They're both superheroes. It reminds me to be proud of who I am while I push myself to be more. That is much easier said than done, but I think we all need it. How can we decide we're worth fighting for if we see ourselves as weak and worthless? Find your strengths. Praise God for those strengths, and work to develop new strengths trusting that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Phil 4:13). There is always hope, and just like I am getting stronger in my body, I have to believe that I will get stronger in managing my life.

How My Mom Saved Me From an Eating Disorder

See how fat I was. . . ?

I remember the first time. I had scooped up some of my mom's white fluffy frosting with an Oreo, and ate it. It was so good, but I immediately felt a panic inside me. You see, I was fat. I was SO FAT, and that Oreo with frosting was going to add to my fat. I had to get it out! I had to run. So, upstairs, in my bathroom, I gagged myself and got it out. I felt a huge rush. I had control over that Oreo and frosting. I ate it, but I got rid of it before it hurt me.

I was maybe 16 or 17 years old, and I was about 105 lbs. I ate very little, and I purged several more times over the next few years. My mom and my sister noticed first. I was already thin, but still losing weight. My jaw and collarbone were really showing it. I was afraid of food.

My mom was amazing. Instead of crying or scolding me or lecturing me on how wrong I was for thinking I was fat, she took me in to a hospital that had a special machine that measured body fat. I got my swimsuit on, and got in the machine. It was a large glass box with a bench seat. I sat down. Water filled up all around me. I breathed all the air out of my lungs, and put my head under. Then, jets of air shot all over me from the walls of the box. Soon, it was done, I lifted my head, breathed in, and the water receded. The test results measured a very healthy body fat percentage. My mom knew that nothing less would help me believe that I was not fat.

I didn't immediately recover from my eating disorder, but I'll never forget what my mom did to save me from myself.

Older, wiser, and getting stronger

Twenty years later, I am learning the correct way to think of food, weight, and my body. Good food is my fuel. I am loving working out, and I am seeing results a lot faster than I thought I would. FYI: I am down a pant size!!! My large workout pants weren't fitting as well. So, I tried on the mediums that I haven't been able to wear yet. They fit!!

I am not only getting healthier and stronger in my body, but also in my mind. I know that I can control and change my body into what I want it to be. I can control my food choices. I can control my portion sizes. I can control my activity level. Taking control of my health and fitness is teaching me self control, and I am excited to see what else in my life will start to flourish as I develop this character trait.

I want to end with thanking my mom. My life could've been shortened or very different if she didn't handle things with such gentleness and wisdom back then. Thank you, Mom. I love you so much, and it still means the world to me that you went to all that trouble to show me the facts about my body. You will never know how much that impacted my life.