I Will Be Brave. Here It Goes. (Progress Pics)

Matt updated my progress pictures today. He told me that I should be brave and share the ones that show my midsection to show you how far I've really come in the last 7 weeks. This is scary for me, but in the hope that it may encourage or inspire someone out there, I will share these with you. The pictures on the left were taken on April 8th. The pictures on the right were taken today, May 26th. I am very thankful for my trainer and all he is teaching me about diet and exercise. I just do whatever he tells me to do, and clearly he knows what he's doing because I'm seeing results fast!

Guess What? I Am Officially a Bodybuilder!!

I am a bodybuilder! In fact, I've built 7 bodies. *Ba-dum-bum--ting* (If you know me very well, you know jokes are not my strength. So, just laugh anyway, okay? I think it's funny! hahaha)

I am SO excited to tell you that I did chest presses with the 20lb dumbbells yesterday!!! Remember this post from just a month ago? Yay!!! I'm getting stronger!! I've lost baby weight lots of times, but to actually get stronger and see myself get muscle definition is amazing! Please do this for yourself. You know you wouldn't regret it. Stop thinking about it, and do it! If you can find a way to join a gym and hire a trainer, do it. It's worth every penny. (Now, I sound like Chewbacca Mom.) If you can't, then do what you can do. Everyone can simply make healthy choices. If you're reading this, then you have internet access. Find some healthy meal plans, and stop drinking sugar!

Also, I want to tell you something else. One of my favorite things about getting older is watching my stereotypes constantly get destroyed. The more I live, the more variety of friends I make, and it's awesome.  I NEVER thought I would be friends with anyone who was into bodybuilding and went to competitions. It's not my thing for sure, but my trainer and his girlfriend are 2 of the sweetest people I've ever met, and I am cheering for them. I may even go to her competition to cheer her on! Go them!!

Last, but certainly not least, I have lost 18.5 pounds in the last 7 weeks!! I feel so much better about myself. I have more energy, more confidence, and I'm happier.  The recital is in 2 1/2 weeks, and that's just going to be life changing for me. I'm about to get on a stage dressed up like a gypsy, and dance to a Cher song from the 70s. Hahaha!!! Oh, I really am LOVING being in my 30s. I'm a lot more fun than I was in any other decade of my life. We'll get our pictures next week, and I'll post them. I really hope I'm not making a weird face and my hair is fuzzing on the side... O_O

A Peek at My Gypsy Costume!! It Will Be Better For The Recital.

Oh, P.S.- Yesterday was cheat day! My friend, Jenna, came over, and we made Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo and Garlic Bread with Chocolate Chip Cookies for dessert. So good!!! I'm back to normal today. I need to go make some more fish! :) 

Food Glorious Foooooood!!

Okay, it's late. I'm tired. I am learning a lot about food lately, and those vultures from Ice Age The Meltdown just popped in my head singing that Food song.  Hahaha!!

I'm doing very well on my diet plan, but there have been some struggles. Here are the lessons I am learning that are true for me:

1. Healthy eating requires a clean kitchen.  When there are few clean dishes or counter space and the stove top is a dirty cluttered mess, the idea of food prep is overwhelming!!  The opposite is also true. When my kitchen is clean, I am inspired to spend time there making good food and treats for my family.

2. It is hard for me to get in all my meals. It has a lot to do with point #1, but also, I need to prep for the week so I can just grab a ready made meal, warm it up, and eat. As it is, I am often having my 2nd meal (2 of 6) at lunchtime. I was feeling lightheaded the other day doing my workout because I just needed to eat.

3. Tilapia is best with taco seasoning!!!

4. Cheat day is important. It helps me stay strong because I know I'll allow myself to indulge in just a few days! When I started this process, I didn't get that.

5. Cheat day is dangerous. My cheat day is on Tuesday because Matt is usually off. Last Tuesday, I made tacos and coca cola cake. It was so good. . . too good. . . ugh. . . I haven't weighed myself since, and it's Saturday night. . .

6. I need my almond butter. I am supposed to eat 2 tablespoons of natural peanut butter/almond butter at night. I ran out a couple days ago, and I feel like I'm cheating because I am substituting with walnuts and some protein shake mix and water or fat free plain Greek yogurt.

7. I CAN make amazing chocolate chip cookies and not eat any (cookies or dough). I just did it today and my respect for my will power went up a lot. It is a big deal to me because I could eat 6 of those cookies easy after a few spoonfuls of cookie dough. BUT I DID IT! I even rinsed off the chocolate that got on my finger. Take that, Chocoholism!!! BOOM!


I guess 7 is my number of lessons to share. I will continue to work on getting my kitchen cleaned up and beautiful. Meanwhile, there is a container of rice and a container of fish to get me through tomorrow!

**This has nothing to do with food, but I want to share this collage that my trainer made with some pictures he took of our fun "Baby Day" at the gym. Isaiah came with me, and now believes he will be huge and ripped in a few years. It was a fun day. Selah sure enjoyed it! It was very cool of him to make a babywearing workout plan for us. It sure makes it more challenging!!

The Little Mama That Could

1. My muscles are teeny. 2. Daisy works so hard!
3. First time successfully doing a plank with my feet on the
stability ball!! 4. 5 minute bridge! 

I've had a cold the last few days. Mucinex is how I am surviving. I haven't missed any workouts, though. Friday, Matt and I went to the gym and did some cardio. I did about 20 minutes on the stair stepper while Matt was on the treadmill next to me. Then, we went over to the bikes. It's crazy how much slower you burn calories on the bike compared to the stair stepper! It was nice having Matt with me. Saturday, I crushed my lower body routine at home! I doubled my reps for the squats, and I added 5 reps to all the other sets. I also did my core routine. So, yeah. I felt pretty awesome. Then on Sunday, I went to the gym, and spent 40 minutes on the stair stepper. I still wasn't feeling 100%. So, I didn't push myself to beat my record. Monday, I did upper body. I had to use lighter weights for some of the exercises. So, I felt a little wimpy, but it was because I am still sick. I don't feel too guilty.

My favorite meal:
rice, taco seasoned tilapia,romaine lettuce,
baby spinach, 1/2 avocado, and tomato slices
with lime squeezed all over it.

Today was a training day! Matt came with me. It was great. I forgot to get pictures of us! All legs. The leg press is fun. That's how I move furniture! Hey, my calves are getting defined, by the way!

I'm down 16 pounds since I started training 6 weeks ago!  That puts me 22 pounds away from my original goal, but since I'm weight training, that end goal will probably change due to muscle weight gain.

I'm working so hard, but my hemophilia gene is showing. the sides of my thighs, especially my left thigh, is all bruised up from the weights. I'm pretty sure that won't look nice in a swimsuit! Any hemo carriers reading this have tips on bruising less??

Progress Pics!!
First pics taken on April 8th.
Pink shirt pics taken today, May 17th.
In 6 weeks, I've lost 16lbs, and I've gone from large pants to medium!

It's Not Just About My Body. It's About My Life.

Like a lot of moms, I often feel like I am totally screwing up my kids. I am basically a hot mess. I always have been. The house is a mess. The laundry is insane. We are late at least half the time. I forget things. I have a hard time remembering to put things away. I think about making dinner when it is time to eat it. Really. I even drive myself nuts. However, I am pretty good at talking to my kids, connecting with them, really hearing them and encouraging them to be open with me by earning their trust. I try hard to validate their feelings, and teach them what is right through love and understanding. I encourage my husband to go after his dreams and ambitions. I try to be a good friend. I've learned the hard way to not judge others, but to love them just as they are. But that other stuff that I stink at. . . it really bothers me and makes me feel like a failure all. the. time.

One of my major motivations for working so hard on my fitness goals is to teach myself self control. I am never going to be better at any of those things if I can't even discipline myself with my own body. Everything I eat now is planned. I workout based on a plan. I am reaching my goals, and I'm pushing myself hard. 

You may have heard of Flylady. Flylady encourages you to get your home under control baby step by baby step. The first step is to shine your sink. The reason she emphasizes this so much is to give you something to feel proud of everyday. Even if the whole house is a mess, you can look at your shiny sink, and feel like you've accomplished something. Suddenly, the rest of your housework seems doable. 

I think I am my own shiny sink. I want to bring my body under control so I can prove to myself that I can be disciplined. I can work hard. I can stick with it. I can reach my goals. I can be strong in my body and in my spirit. When that happens, I believe everything else will get better. 

One kind of silly thing that encourages me is this: I made this side by side picture of Mrs. Incredible and Wonder Woman. I jokingly say that I found my "before and after training pictures". The thing is: They're both superheroes. It reminds me to be proud of who I am while I push myself to be more. That is much easier said than done, but I think we all need it. How can we decide we're worth fighting for if we see ourselves as weak and worthless? Find your strengths. Praise God for those strengths, and work to develop new strengths trusting that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Phil 4:13). There is always hope, and just like I am getting stronger in my body, I have to believe that I will get stronger in managing my life.

How My Mom Saved Me From an Eating Disorder

See how fat I was. . . ?

I remember the first time. I had scooped up some of my mom's white fluffy frosting with an Oreo, and ate it. It was so good, but I immediately felt a panic inside me. You see, I was fat. I was SO FAT, and that Oreo with frosting was going to add to my fat. I had to get it out! I had to run. So, upstairs, in my bathroom, I gagged myself and got it out. I felt a huge rush. I had control over that Oreo and frosting. I ate it, but I got rid of it before it hurt me.

I was maybe 16 or 17 years old, and I was about 105 lbs. I ate very little, and I purged several more times over the next few years. My mom and my sister noticed first. I was already thin, but still losing weight. My jaw and collarbone were really showing it. I was afraid of food.

My mom was amazing. Instead of crying or scolding me or lecturing me on how wrong I was for thinking I was fat, she took me in to a hospital that had a special machine that measured body fat. I got my swimsuit on, and got in the machine. It was a large glass box with a bench seat. I sat down. Water filled up all around me. I breathed all the air out of my lungs, and put my head under. Then, jets of air shot all over me from the walls of the box. Soon, it was done, I lifted my head, breathed in, and the water receded. The test results measured a very healthy body fat percentage. My mom knew that nothing less would help me believe that I was not fat.

I didn't immediately recover from my eating disorder, but I'll never forget what my mom did to save me from myself.

Older, wiser, and getting stronger

Twenty years later, I am learning the correct way to think of food, weight, and my body. Good food is my fuel. I am loving working out, and I am seeing results a lot faster than I thought I would. FYI: I am down a pant size!!! My large workout pants weren't fitting as well. So, I tried on the mediums that I haven't been able to wear yet. They fit!!

I am not only getting healthier and stronger in my body, but also in my mind. I know that I can control and change my body into what I want it to be. I can control my food choices. I can control my portion sizes. I can control my activity level. Taking control of my health and fitness is teaching me self control, and I am excited to see what else in my life will start to flourish as I develop this character trait.

I want to end with thanking my mom. My life could've been shortened or very different if she didn't handle things with such gentleness and wisdom back then. Thank you, Mom. I love you so much, and it still means the world to me that you went to all that trouble to show me the facts about my body. You will never know how much that impacted my life.

Surprise!! The Kids are The Best Part.

I am amazed at how making my health and fitness a high priority is such a wonderful thing for my children. I honestly didn't realize how much they'd love this. I have 7 children, and they all support me 100%. They are excited that I am getting stronger. They love to hear when I beat my record on the stair stepper. Probably, the most important thing is that they like to jump in and exercise with me when they can.  Isaiah brought my weights and yoga mat upstairs today so I could workout while the kids were playing outside. Isaiah, my main coach, took a bunch of pictures.  Halfway through, they all came back in, and I had a room full of coaches, teammates, spectators, and cheerleaders.

Moms, we constantly feel guilty for choosing to take care of ourselves, but we are wrong. I am seeing the proof of this right now. When we put on our oxygen masks, our children can breathe easier.

Less importantly, I had a great weekend. Friday evening, I went to the gym. Since the stair stepper was taken, I improvised on the treadmill by getting it up to 8.0 incline. On Saturday afternoon, while my mother in law watched the kids, I went to the gym, and broke my record on the stair stepper: 123 floors, 50 minutes! Then, today was a home workout. So, I decided to do my lower body workout (in pics above). I was going to do core too, but it's late now (you know, for a mommy).  :)